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Expensive Trip!

It was nice to get down to London and catch up with Paul again, but there’s always a reluctance to come home! Let’s face it, this is a pretty dismal area. Birmingham, the city, is okay enough, but the rest? Pah!

Paul and I went into the British Museum for a while and looked at a lot of old Egyptian thingies. He tried to take a couple of snaps, but neither came out very well. The last time I went in the place was a school trip back in 1981; it brought back a lot of memories, even though it’s changed a lot since then. The main memory, alas, is of me dying of thirst and not being allowed to go to the canteen for a drink until we’d looked at everything we were supposed to see. School trips simply aren’t designed to be enjoyed.

Expensive Trip!
Horrible, weird, blurry pic in the British Museum. Better luck next time, Paul!
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The Office

I did buy some office-friendly clothes today, including a shirt. The venue was H&M. I usually buy stuff from M&S, since we have food from there, but they’re pricey. H&M are cheaper, although their displays are appallingly untidy and disordered. And the clothes are quite dirty in some cases; they had a pale blue shirt I might have bought had they not all been mingingly filthy and creased… okay, they can be washed and ironed, but that’s not the point.

If this sounds like I’m planning to get an office job, well, I’m not. Not really. It would entirely upset my long-term image as an arty-farty anarchist. I’m merely being… pragmatic.
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Suit You

Yes: fashion! With all the good will in the world, I wouldn’t portray myself as a style icon. The majority of my wardrobe could be best described as casual—and like seemingly everyone else, I have a pair of those loose jeans that hang around the hips. But what about the more formal side?

I’m not familiar with suits. I’ve avoided offices most of my life, in pursuit of creative directions I have complete control over. It hasn’t been very successful. I remember working one day in an office six years ago (I lasted a whole day!), and I had immense trouble finding something to wear… I scrambled to find a pair of black trousers (which were very old), coupled with a shirt that wasn’t in the best condition of all time, only to find the man and woman in the office with me were wearing jeans! This is not typical of office situations, though.
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The Fox and the Hair

At a certain point in a person’s life, it seems, their hair sometimes turns to shit. When you were 18, your hair was shiny and lustrous: what went wrong? (If your answer is, ‘It fell out!’, we’re talking at cross purposes.)

My hair used to be very greasy in my 20s, but it got better. Alas, in the last couple of years, it’s gone down the greasy track again. I know it’s not just me—I was talking to someone who’s had the same thing a while back, and her conclusion was, it’s a result of getting older. I’m not inspired by this theory.
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Small Things

What can be affirming on a day when you’re feeling just a little bit insecure? To me, Thursday provided it in the form of a phone call that made me feel a lot more positive… and getting thanked by someone for making a hopefully useful suggestion (you’re welcome, Matthew!)… and best of all, getting an e-mail from a very good friend that had been delayed for several days due to ISP problems—just a little note saying they’re out of town for a while.
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Convert to the Ring

Well, much to my surprise, mom did finally decide to give Lord of the Rings a fair hearing. We watched the first two episodes recently. Not on the same night, okay! 🙂 She hates this kind of thing normally, but all the hype and good reviews weakened her resolve. Of course, she ended up thinking they were terrific, and we plan to see the final part at the cinema soon. (Not right now; we’re both suffering from yet another cold virus at the moment. Lovely.)

Watching The Two Towers a second time helped resolve some of my own reservations about it. I’m told the extended version has better editing, but on the whole, I enjoyed it better than the first viewing. Look, I won’t forgive Jackson for the Christopher Lee thing in a hurry, but that doesn’t mean I don’t admire this work on many levels. It’s a genuine achievement.
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Does a New Year Mean Anything?

I’m not sorry to see 2003 go. It was in some ways a significant year… we got the house move situation sorted out, finally, and I made the arguably foolish decision to kiss Der State Benefit System goodbye because I no longer felt my life was my own…

That said, I can no longer define a year as a unit as precisely as I felt I once could. Each year once appeared to have a particular ‘personality,’ which no longer seems to be the case (to me). Well, after all, a year is just an arbitrary unit of measurement, so the former impression was probably illusory.
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I Want to be a Brain Surgeon

It’s odd how my vocal acceptance of Web design not being the career for me causes another long debate about it! I can’t escape from it.

What I really want is to go into brain surgery. But I need practice. I have a load of good utensils in the kitchen. Volunteers? Er, no one’s doubting my inestimable skill are they?
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Slight Improvement?!

I’m experiencing some emotional turmoil, with various factors ever-present. My employment situation, general isolation and lack of self-belief, etc. They’re big issues, without any obvious answers, and it drags my morale down constantly. It is possible in fifteen years to go from thinking you have tons of creative potential to believing you’re worth nothing. A long cycle of non-success is usually sufficient.
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