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Angst Equals Great Art?

On the creative front: I’m asking myself about how and why one can derive creativity from angst or annoyance. This is interesting. I used to be able to channel any number of frustrations into creative work—I think it’s still possible, to an extent, but since my life, while still needing a lot of work, is broadly more tolerable than it was, say, two years ago, I find myself less creatively inclined toward using negative feelings in this way.

I wonder if that’s a good or bad thing? I suppose it’s good in most ways. Whereas when my life was truly down the toilet I could have used even a minor annoyance as a reason to write some dark, brooding, ponderous chunk of bile, I somehow don’t feel that need anymore.
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Hair Raising

Did I mention I’m thinking of having some blonde added to the front of my hair? Time for something different. Maybe on my one non-bad hair day this year! Anyway, it’s a look I like, unless my friendly neighbourhood stylist talks me out of it!

I finally booked the moving of the rest of my stuff into the flat for Thursday the 22nd. It’s costing £40, so a tenner less than it might’ve been.
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This and That

A bit of retail therapy today, in anticipation of being skint very soon (said therapy pretty much guarantees that!). Most importantly, I bought a new jacket for while the weather is still a bit bobbins: I won’t describe the horror that was my only other coat suited to the weather, but suffice it to say this was a necessary purchase.

I’ve been trying to track down someone who would move the rest of my stuff into the flat for less than £50. This is an uncertain situation at the moment, but even if it does cost £50, it’s being done next Thursday or Friday. I hope I can get it cheaper, but enough’s enough.

I decided to re-read some H.P. Lovecraft recently. I realised it’d been about ten years at least since I’d read any of his stuff—I have a three-volume set of his work I bought eons ago.
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Lethargy

Monday was a fairly lethargic day. Batteries are recharging slowly. My insomnia hasn’t improved much, by the way. 🙂

Reflections

I’m going through a period of reflection at the moment. I still feel strange. I can’t turn my feelings on and off at will.

Many thanks to those who have e-mailed me today. Knowing a few people care and understand makes this a little easier—there are always doubts and fears around such a difficult decision. Contact with others makes me feel less alone in this.
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